Jamie Otis first learned that her dreams of becoming a mom and watching her baby bump grow were shattered in June. She publicly shared the news of her devastating miscarriage months later, but today is another heart-wrenching day for then Married at First Sight star: it would have been her baby’s due date.
Just like in her previous post where she described her horrific experience along with a photo of her “baby who was born too early” in order to show other women who are suffering that they aren’t alone, Jamie is just as candid about her pain on this difficult day.
“Today I’m supposed to have a sweet, full-term baby boy. He’s supposed to put me in labor and scream when he comes out,” Jamie wrote along with a collection of bittersweet photos. “His daddy and I would hold him close and let him know that everything’s going to be okay.”
Although Jamie was able to rock her baby after his stillbirth, she wasn’t able to soothe all of his fears away and she’s still coping with that painful reality. “Sometimes I still ask God, ‘Why??’ I often wonder if I hadn’t eaten this or lifted that maybe he’d still be safe?” Jamie wrote. “I know it’s probably nothing I did, but it just breaks my heart knowing that his sweet little soul didn’t get a chance at life.”
On the day that this hopeful mom-to-be once envisioned celebrating Johnathan Edward’s birth, she’s instead cherishing her “angel baby” and takes comfort in knowing that even though he was born too early, he’s now watching over her. “I will spend my life honoring him and loving him,” Jamie added.
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